Battlestations, this is not a drill

Happy Veterans Day

I've been thinking a lot today about what being a Veteran means to me now.

It was over 26 years ago that I joined the Navy. I joined in an act of desperation. I knew that my life was going downhill fast and that if I didn't do something drastic to change my situation I would end up in prison or dead. I knew that I had no discipline or organization and I had no real drive to better myself. I was 22, homeless, unemployed, angry and estranged from society. I had no sense of belonging.

So I did the most drastic thing I could think of. Signed my name and offered up my life; though doing so felt unrealistic and romantic to me at the time. I learned what integrity meant the day I left for boot camp because I made a promise, and I am only as good as my word. I learned how to be an adult, and take care of myself and stand up for myself. I learned how to fight and when to fight. I learned how important it is to care about the well being of others, and what my actions ensured for those I loved and those I'd never met.

But I also learned the unexpected burdens placed on Soldiers. In August of 1998, Osama Bin Laden bombed two of our US embassies in Africa; killing over 200 people and injuring thousands of others. This happened while my ship, the USS Shiloh, was in the Gulf of Oman on deployment. In the middle of the night our ship left the battlegroup behind and did a solo run out of the Gulf. We sounded the battlestations alarms mid-day and at 7pm the night of August 20th, we fired 13 tomahawk missiles at Afghanistan in retaliation. We remained battle ready and sped away while Pakistani planes circled us waiting to drop bombs on us should one of those missiles hit their soil  (To be clear, my battle station was the medical bay, and once the missiles left the ship, we lost all control over them - They were then being guided by the pentagon).

We made it out unscathed and several key targets were destroyed. But the mission came with this burden: innocent civilians died. Some of our intel was faulty and we destroyed a clinical research lab that provided half the country with medicines for malaria, diabetes, gonorrhea, and tuberculosis. This caused an epidemic of infectious diseases amongst the most vulnerable, the poor and the innocent civilian population. This one misplaced bomb caused a ripple effect that, over time, can be seen with a much wider perspective. 

The USS Cole, which was the same type of ship as ours took the retaliation that was meant for us the following year. 9/11 came three years after this. Two wars came after this. Millions of refugees were displaced. Civil wars began, cities and entire histories were leveled. And while there is and was nothing we as individual sailors, could have done differently, it becomes the unexpected burden that veterans have to carry. The knowledge that while serving their country and ensuring our freedoms, their actions cost innocent people their lives.

 This picture is one of those missiles leaving our ship. Is it The Missile? I don't know, who could? But it is the only photo from my time in the Navy that I have hanging in my home, right on my bedroom wall. I need to see it every day to remind myself that our actions have unforeseen consequences. That if we aren't careful with ourselves and our deeds, we can cause great, irreparable damage to others. I use it to remind myself that I fought for what I believed was just and right; freedom and equality. I still fight for what is just and right for all people because becoming a man made me realize that it's all of us or none of us. We are literally all in this together. It is the fire that was lit in me then and it burns even more brightly now.

I felt an unexpected bond with people who were once strangers that can't be duplicated any other way because of this experience. My shipmates became my family, my conscience and my best reward in the long run. So while I like to joke and say "I wouldn't do it again, but I wouldn't undo it", what I really mean is, it helped shape my very being. I am Honor, Courage and Commitment because of the Navy.

Thank you for letting me serve, and for bringing me home safe, and for all the friends I made that kept me safe. Becky, McCartney, Micah, Roy, Playmo, Roberta, Adam, BJ, Brian, Chad, James, Cody, Jeffrey, Justin

I ask you to take some time today to think about the people in your lives who have given this promise to America. Veterans have given their word to protect this country with everything that they have, including their lives. Remember to not only thank them and be there for them, but to make sure your commitment to whatever you do rises to the same level.

Happy Veterans Day

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Infinite_Reach

https://academic.oup.com/cid/article/34/Supplement_5/S171/363964