Holly Jolly Christmas, It's the last post of the year...

This Christmas was a very good one.

Unlike most everyone I know, I never have to worry about the last minute frantic holiday shopping. Thank god, trying to get around downtown in the shopping district in December is a prospect that shouldn’t be faced without full body armor and a very big stick. I do my shopping all year long. The benefit of being far from any family is that I can buy those gifts all year long and am not tempted to just give them then and there (this being the sole reason my Mom can’t do the all year thing). This year there was one gift of choice for pretty much everyone on my list; Planet Earth. If you haven’t checked it out, do. It is the most amazing look at our planet that has ever been made… but back to the story at hand.

This year has been particularly hard on my family. Every single one of us lost our job this year. My dad was let go from his job of 16 years as a school bus driver. My mom was let go from her job of almost 20 years as Art Director of an advertising agency. I left my job of managing a law firm’s office services department in February. My brother lost his job at The United Way. My sister in law got downsized out of her job at the Louisville Tourism Board. So all in all, not a good work year for the family.

Although… It kind of was a good personal year for all of us. Both mom and dad hated their jobs. Dad has actually found a much better job with much better hours doing the only other thing he loves as much as playing the drums and skydiving; taking care of handicapped kids. Mom has finally taken the plunge full on and started her own business. She had been toying with the idea for years and was kinda sorta doing it before she got laid off, but now she has really stepped up to the plate and is starting to really succeed. Plus now, she has a much much better boss. My brother finally graduated college after slowly pecking away at his degree for over ten years. And I got a part time job that I absolutely LOVE.

I guess that balances out the good and the bad. We knew it was going to be a cheap Christmas this year. Nothing new for our family though. We have been through some very hard times. There were times in our lives when all that we could afford to eat were ramen noodles and potatoes. Our little family has known destitution and desperation. The one thing I can say about my parents is that no matter how bad things were and no matter how broke we were, Josh and I never wanted for anything. There were things we knew we would never have, but we also knew that not having those things would not be the end of the world.

My parents always provided for us. The testament to this is that Josh and I never really knew how close we came to real poverty. For this alone I owe my parents as many great Christmases as I can possibly give them. So this year while we were all reeling from the shock of the unemployment I devised a plan. I knew that Josh and Mel were going to stay in Kentucky for Christmas because it was also their ten year anniversary. They were finally going to take their honeymoon, so all I had to do was figure out how to give mom and dad a good Christmas.

My mom loves San Francisco. One of her favorite places in this city is sitting on the chaise lounge in my bay window reading and people watching. She has been here several times, including my 30^th birthday party when I rented out the restaurant on the corner of gay and gayer. I thought if I could somehow convince them to come here for the holidays they would have a great time. So I talked my mom into it and she talked dad into it, and that was it.

They drove up Saturday afternoon… and when I say drove up it took them almost nine hours!! That night they rested up from the drive, my mom passed out early and my dad and I stayed up shooting the breeze till about two in the morning (a regular occurrence in our household). Sunday morning my mom wanted to go to church, so she and I went to services at the place I work. She loved it. The priest even made sure to welcome her in his opening sermon.

We went to lunch and had a nice casual stroll around the neighborhood. My mom is a sucker for the architecture here and I loved walking around with them showing them all the really cool things. They also really liked being in the Castro and seeing me say hi to so many people. It made them happy to see what a good life I have here. Sunday night Danny came over and the four of us went to appease my moms burning desire to have Chinese food in Chinatown. I know I avoid that area most of the time, but that night it was quiet and magical. We had a great meal and then walked around looking at all the Chinese knock-off shops.

On Monday mom and I spent the day preparing the Christmas Eve feast. Stuffing, potatoes, candied yams, green-bean casserole, five-cup salad and a twenty pound turkey. By dinner time we were ravenous, and the house was full of good smells and friendly people. Nine of us sat around the living room gabbing and eating Christmas dinner that night: My parents and I, Danny, my roommates Chris and Gabe, Gabes friend James, Stephanie and Jen and Reverend Annie. Talk about some interesting high spirited talk, the nine of us just had a blast.

At 9 my parents, Steph, Jen, Annie and myself all left the house to walk up the block to watch and sing in the traditional Christmas Eve concert at the Castro Theatre, put on by the SF Gay Mens Chorus. With special guest stars LGCSF (my chorus) led by Stephanie. As usual we stole the show and my parents had a GAY ‘ol time!

Christmas morning we got up, made pancakes, eggs and bacon and settled into the living room. Again joined by Gabe and James we had fun opening presents and eating. Being Jewish, this was Gabe’s first Christmas, and it was like having a ten year old in the house he was so excited. My parents, meanwhile, couldn’t help but share embarrassing stories from my childhood. I got the one thing that I asked for, which was my mom’s old acoustic guitar. I asked for that for two very specific reasons one, I want to learn to play and not having a guitar of my own was my last excuse, and secondly (mom, don’t read this part) I wanted to ask for something that wouldn’t cost them any money.

We hung out and watched movies and episodes of Planet Earth all day. I love my parents, that is a given, but I also really like them. When I hear about peoples holiday horror stories with family it always makes me a little sad. My parents and I spent a lot of time in my formative years getting to know each other as people. Not only would I seek their advice, but they would seek mine. This helped us create an adult bond that a lot of people don’t have with their families. So although they are my parents and I love them, they are also completely singular individuals with lives outside of home and each other. Let’s just put it this way… I had to join the Navy because at the age of 22 my parents still had much more exciting lives than I did!

On Wednesday morning they packed all the bags and loaded up the car for the long drive back. The one thing that came out of this visit is the very real possibility for them to live and thrive in the bay area. I couldn’t be more thrilled to have my parents closer… now all I have to do is keep reminding them…

I can’t really think of another way to end this post other than, I hope that you, dear reader, got to experience as much love, camaraderie and joy as I did this Christmas. And if you didn’t, I just want to remind you that Christmas is just an idea. It is there to bring the sentiments out that we pack away most of the year. So if you didn’t have a great holiday, make up for it by sharing those feelings of love and joy throughout the year to come.

Merry Christmas and I wish you nothing but the best in the new year...