My unofficial profession

When I was in 6th grade at Parmalee Elemetary school in Indian Hills, CO. The school music teacher got it in her head that we were old enough and mature enough to tackle for that years school play, Gilbert and Sullivan's: The Mikado.

I have no memory of auditioning, but somehow, miraculously, I was cast in the title role as The Mikado. I was eleven years old and thrilled to death! It may have been the fact that I was the only kid in the school that had heard of the musical. For which I tip my hat to my mom for constantly watching musicals with me as a child. We even used to play a game out and about; if we heard a song and one of us recognized it from a show, we would call out "name that show" and see who had the more expansive musical knowledge (usually her, but I stumped her once or twice). So it helped that I had heard the music before.

The night we went on, I could see my mom in the audience beaming, and I had this feeling of such pure joy and I knew. I was meant to be an actor. It is what I was born to do, the feeling inside of me was so true and pure that there was no way I was ever going to be happy doing anything else.

Fast forward to high school where I was in every single show from sophomore year on... "No, No, a Million Times No", "Cactus Flower", "Grease", "Up the Down Staircase", "You Cant Take it With You", "Hello Dolly", "A Midsummer Nights Dream", "The Diary of Anne Frank" and "Oklahoma", not to mention doing either a song or monologue in every talent show I could get accepted into every year. It was in me, everyone said so, "Shane, there's no doubt your going to be famous one day, your just so naturally talented."  This is what everyone told me, and while I tried to believe them, I was also terrified about the chances someone with my "look" had of making it in the harshest industry in the world. I've never been the leading man type. And at that point I was just a pimply faced chubby teenage gay boy, not the striking man I am now...

After high school I got distracted when I discovered GAY, and all that came with it. It was during this time period that I started my unofficial professional career: getting laid off. The sheer number of jobs I've had make my mind go fuzzy. I've worked in countless industry's, in numerous capacities, from Nurse, to fireman to flight crew. I've worked in insurance, real estate, advertising, property management, law offices, records offices, a homeless soup kitchen, blood draw clinics, hospitals, schools, tv stations, condominium's, residential manager to club bouncer. I've even applied and been accepted to the SF Police Academy (I didn't go). The only official college experience I have was that summer theater course at a community college and when I went to a vocational school and got certified as a nurse assistant and phlebotomist, and even after going to school, I still couldn't find a steady job.

It was during this time that my life started to spiral a little bit out of control. I was out partying all the time, staying at friends places for days at a time without calling home. I was homeless a couple times, started drinking a little and couldn't for the life of keep a job. That's when I learned that sometimes to save yourself you have to so something really drastic. So at 22, as an openly gay man I went and got the only job that I could find where I couldn't get fired. I joined the navy.

In an ironic twist of fate, I actually did get fired from the navy. I put them through a viscous legal battle and eventually won both my honor and my benefits, but also my freedom. I do credit them with teaching me what I needed to know. How to be organized, disciplined and to do the best you can every day. For that, I am grateful for having served. But there I was jobless again, mom and dad had moved into a one bedroom apartment so I couldn't move home, so off to SF I went to stay with Sarah... She's a whole other story...

After getting separated from the military I moved to the Bay Area and continued my trend of short lived jobs. I filled in for a nurse on sabbatical for 6 months then worked for another Dr for three months before realizing I didn't want to be a nurse anymore. From there I went on to an 8 month job as a records clerk for a banking institution. Then 6 months in records at a law firm. Then I got sent on a temp assignment as an admin assistant at Jones Lang LaSalle, and after 11 months they hired me on permanently as an executive assistant. I worked there for just over three years. Just a little less than the time I spent in the navy.

I left JLL of my own volition when I was offered the position of Executive Assistant to the Deputy Director of a really big hospital. It was a great job. I finally had my own office, with a door and a closet. I was happy. Three months later she got a huge promotion to another campus, and I got laid off because they couldn't justify an assistant for an empty position.

Back to temping.

I got a great gig running the USF law clinics for two semesters (9 months) before they hired someone permanently for the position. Then I went over to an Office Services management position where I worked for 8 months until the guy I was hired to replace made it clear he wouldn't be leaving after all. From there I worked in a bunch of different offices that have all blurred together in my mind.

Then I got the job at the Elks Lodge. I worked there as the Office Manager/Membership Manager/Business Manager for three years until I forced enough change to more above board business practices that they eventually found a way to terminate me. And while I have very little respect for some of the people at that lodge, I don't want to spend a lot of time bad mouthing them either. Lets just say that while I worked there I felt a lack of integrity in the operations to such a severe degree that I was happy to have my name removed from that place.

From there I again went back to my temp agency where they had me on three different jobs within the next year one at a hotel for a month and a half, four months as the warranty services officer and tour guide at a new condo complex by the ball park and 7 months at a fancy high rise apt building as a concierge.

It was this last job that went on to buy me out of my contract with my temp agency and offer me the promotion to Resident Service Supervisor of a Related LLC building. This was the great job that I got the offer letter the same day I got my eviction notice. And while I did a damn good job while I worked there I rubbed the decorator the wrong way and she complained and had me fired. That and the problems I had been finding while learning the accounting systems. Basically, because most of the business was operating in NY they didn't adhere to the same property laws that we have here in CA. So they sent people's deposits out late and I got blamed for it. Even though I was the one who was shouting the loudest for help. Whatever.

From there, again, back to temping... I'm telling you, my agency Office Team, loves me. I'm a great candidate for them, I have been bought out several times and the people that get me for short term usually keep me much longer than my original assignment was for. So technically, I've made a profession of short term jobs. I've never been at a job for longer than 4 years... Unless you count that one non profit... I did serve on the Board of Directors as both President and Vice President for a total of five years for my Chorus, and while I accomplished a lot of things I am very proud of there, it was never a paying job.

So last year when I got let go from Related, there was some weird serendipity. After not really going after my dream of acting for years I finally decided it was now or never. I had started a singing and acting class when I got my new job, and the night before I got the boot, I had been in class and my coach had asked what I truly wanted to do. "I want to act. I want to be a professional paid actor. It's all I've ever wanted." Once I spoke that into existence the universe lined up to help me. I got out of the job that wasn't acting, got my unemployment coming in, and started auditioning for roles.

They say that in your first year of acting, you can go on a hundred auditions, get twenty call backs and get cast in one thing. They say that you wont start making any money until the middle of your second year, and you wont have an agent until your third year. However, in my first year of acting I went to around 60 auditions, got cast in over twenty-five projects, started making some real money as an actor and got my own agent. This is how I know I am on the right path. This is how I know that I am meant to be an actor.

So for now, I am working boring meaningless office temp jobs that pay the bills while going on auditions, but I am not looking for a "job" or a "career" anymore. I don't belong in an office anymore than a wild animal does. I am an artist. Which means a life of blissful struggle. And if I'm going to have to struggle, I best be doing what I love in the mean time.

"Life is a Struggle
Triumph or Defeat is in the hands of God
So, let us celebrate the struggle"
 - Swahili War Song