Ok... Seriously... isn't that the happiest looking baby you have ever seen? That smile, the eyes... you can tell this baby is ready to take on the world. Oh yeah... uh huh... that's my dad.
I was looking for pictures of my dad that I could put up on my blog for Fathers Day and it turns out this is the only one I have electronically. Look at that picture though... it completely tells you who my dad is. He still has that smile, and uses it constantly. I constantly refer to him as "The King of Corn". He is always either making jokes or trying to make my mom laugh... even now in my thirties, even though I tower over him, he still tries to get me to laugh by tickling me. The eyes are still just as full of wonder, excitement and happiness as they were when this photo was taken. Chuck has always had such a unique view of the world... I wonder if you can see it in his eyes.
I wanted to write something about my dad that would make him laugh and feel appreciated... but I kinda want to steer clear of the corny and cliche... he kinda has the corny market cornered anyway. I am just going to put down some of my memories here and hope that they bring a smile to his face the same way they bring one to mine.
Chuck has always been the best drummer I have ever heard... and while I could go on and on about his talent, he knows what I think about it. I only tell you this to set up this memory. I think it was my ninth or tenth birthday. Josh was doing something I don't remember, and Chuck was playing a gig so it was me and mom. She wanted to do something special for my birthday even though it was just the two of us. In Colorado there is this tiny little gold mining town called Central City. I always loved going there because it was like walking into the old west.
The town was so small and quaint. There was a taffy pull in one window and all kinds of little shiny things that draw the eyes of a child... I remember it being one of my favorite places on earth when I was young. There were even bars with those old swinging doors that you always see the bad guys get thrown through in the movies. We were looking for somewhere to eat lunch and mom said... "why don't we go in here... they have grilled cheese..."
As most of you reading my blog know... that was really all it took...mmmm cheese!!! Well as soon as we went in we heard the rockin music of the band. Not just any band... This was Chucks band playing on the stage. I remember it so well because as soon as the song was over, the lead singer looked at Chuck and then turned to the mike and wished me a happy birthday. It was sooooooo cool. Here I was this little boy in a bar, getting wished happy birthday by the band... I felt so special that day. The only other thing I remember was dancing with my mom while they were playing. Man what a sight that must have been.
Another memory I have was helping Chuck make my mom some mixed tapes. In '89 our grandmother got really sick, and mom moved out to California to be with her. It seemed like forever that she was gone... even though it was only a few months. Chuck missed her as much as we did and decided to make her some mixed tapes calling them "The Love Tapes"... I told you he was corny. I remember sitting on the floor in the music room in the old house in Kitteredge helping Chuck pick out songs. He even let me introduce a couple of them... Years later I heard one of those tapes and my voice on it... man... I don't know how mom stayed away... I POURED on the guilt and the lonesomeness her boys were feeling.
I remember those last few months in Colorado with Chuck very fondly. It was just us boys. Chuck, Josh and I horsing around all the time. We went on hikes together... we got away with movies mom wouldn't rent for us... it was like living in a frat. We had so much fun. Chuck went off to Europe to tour with his band and we went west and settled down in Orange County with mom... Quite a move for Chuck, from the rockies to the beach. But he managed.
The last thing I want to talk about is Chuck and my mom.
I grew up watching movies and tv... every kind. They let us watch whatever we wanted, and I watched more than my share. Well in these movies you always have the grand sweeping epic love story. The hero and the heroine finally coming together through all the obstacles. While this makes for good tv it isn't always the way in reality. There was no triumph of will or defeat of something evil in my parents love story. They met when I was three years old and have been together ever since.
The thing about them, it is obvious how much they love each other. Even when they fight... you can hear it. They are their others missing half. It may have taken Chuck 13 years to propose, but we all knew that it was forever as soon as they met. Not only is their love one that should be admired. But they managed to pass it on to both of their kids. I grew up knowing how much they loved each other and me and my brother. I never had to worry about a broken home. I knew from an early age what love was because of my parents. They taught us what true love was.
Lots of people have their horror stories about their parents. How unaccepting they were, how mean they could be to each other, how some member of the family was always forgotten. These people never get over that and in turn never form adult bonds with their parents. Their parents are always just the people that raised them. I have to say, it has never been that way with my parents. They raised us to think and to be responsible and to have integrity and in so doing they raised good men.
My favorite memory... I saved for last because it is the most recent. In 98 my brother moved to Kentucky with his wife, making it much more difficult to have family gatherings. As I said in a previous post I had only seen my brother and his wife Melissa twice in eight years. Well this past Christmas we all decided it was time to come home. This Christmas my brother and sister in law came home to Orange County and I came home and mom's brothers and their families came home.
The memory that gets me the most and makes me smile the most is the five of us (Mom, Chuck, Josh, Mel and I) sitting in the living room Christmas eve, just laughing and catching up... reminiscing about old times, the old house, the things that Josh and I got away with when our parents weren't around. Looking at old photo's of when we were young, mom explaining them to Mel. Chuck making some silly comment. Mom pulling out this photo of Chuck as a little baby that you are now looking at and all of us just giggling for a half hour... It was (insert cliche here) really the best Christmas of our lives.
Happy Fathers Day, old man
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